How hot is it ?!?!

It is so hot...I'm carrying around our box fan from room to room like some cheap plastic purse from KMart. It is so hot, (and perfectly still) that the flag in our yard has become one with its pole.

It is so hot, the chickens are voluntarily lining up at the plucking machine just to loose a few feathers. It is so hot that the  blue bowl of water I put in the baby duck pen, turned into a crock pot and , well, lets just say it was little sad. It is soooo hot that when I took my third shower for the day and sat on the usually ice cold tile seat in the corner, it began to melt and molded itself to my backside.

When I left the shower the seat came with me which might be why some people have referred to me as a real hard A_ _.